Giving up the fight

How do you do that if you do not know better? If you could\’t do anything else, but survive? Surviving in a world that has been unfair for you and have given you the heavy lessons. A life that you would like to see differently, but because the lessons are or were so heavy, you could not get this clear. The pain that encapsulates everything and you do not see things clear anymore. You are having feelings of standing alone in all of this and with moments you can barely keep your head above water. Sometimes you can not see the light at the end of the tunnel, because you are overpowered by the dark. The dark that we so badly want and we fight so hard against, because we want to see the light. But how do you do that if you only have had to fight almost your whole life? How do you get out of that vicious circle of \”misery\” and the black hole?


Feel the pain

Something we do not want to do all the time and we literally flee from the pain. Not necessarily because we want it from ourselves, but because somehow we think we have to. We \”have to\” survive in order to continue in this hard world, where everyone has started to live for themselves and people have difficulty opening up and being vulnerable. This has not been a conscious thing, but this has grown. By the society we live in, the work we do, the education we have received from parents in schools and so on. The basis of this society is built on the fact that you can\’t have feelings and have to continue with your life, and you have to fight for yourself and what you stand for. We have become slaves of the system and lost the connection with our true self. Because of this, we no longer know how and what to do when a \’drama\’ occurs. We no longer know how we have to handle and should feel the pain and so we continue to fight and go in survivalmode. We can not feel the pain, because we have to go on! After all, that is what is expected of us, because otherwise you are weak and otherwise you will not manage in this world is it? Is that true? If you look deep inside and especially \’feel\’, then you know that you want it differently. You just do not know how or you have never learned how. Feeling the pain is not fun, but it is essential to be able to see the light and get out of your survival position. Recognizing that it is there and not resist it, because resistance only creates more of what you do not want. So if you resist your drama or pain, you are just creating more of this. While allowing all the feelings you get in life, good or \’bad\’ , know this can help you again. I put badly between parenthesis, because that is something we have labeled as \’bad\’. Because even those parts that you just push away like that, also belong to you. Those parts that you do not want to feel are also part of life. Only when you push everything away, you will not want to acknowledge those parts of yourself. And with that you do not fully accept yourself.


Love yourself

It is important that you learn to love yourself again in the whole process. That you learn to open your heart to everything that is there. For happiness and sadness, because all those parts belong to you and make you the beautiful person you are. Everyone just wants to experience happiness without feeling the pain. While that pain also belongs to life and shapes you into who you are now. The pain that gives you those beautiful lessons and helps you grow and gives you air again if you have admitted to that pain. Out of love for yourself you can feel what you feel at any given time. Regardless of what someone else or you think of it, because that is your reality at that moment. You can not push away your reality at that moment and pretend it is not there. You can not always play nice weather, because you\’re not feeling that deep inside. Then you can better have a bad day? And know it is ok to feel bad to feel rotten, angry, sad or frustrated? Why do we have to think this is that bad? Why do we label it as bad? We may really be angry, because there is grief under that anger and if you never allow that anger, the grief can never come out of your system. And then you are not kind to yourself, and this is something you do want to be. Because if you are nice to yourself, you will also allow those parts that you do not really want to feel and therefore you will return to your happiness. That is how it is in life, that you can and know it is ok to allow both sides. Only in this way there can be more balance in your life and that\’s how you learn to play with the emotions and energies in life.


Choose for yourself

So take those steps to treat yourself in a loving way and allow those things that you have always been fighting against. Get out of that survival and start living again. Allow yourself and your feelings and just let yourself be \’. Because you are good as you are! You are good in all forms and facets, because it is as it is. Stop fighting! Everyone has good and bad sides, only you can learn to deal with it better. Learn to accept that part of yourself, the world is not made to be perfect. The power lies precisely in accepting the imperfection of yourself and your life. To embrace everything that is there, to get to know yourself and to create the balance that you so desire. Be nice to yourself! Step by step, layer by layer, day after day, and it keeps getting better. You are a beautiful person and you may realize that. Everyone has his imperfections, only we have labeled it as good or not good. We can stop that and finally choose for ourselves. Everything is good, you are good and everything will always be fine. Have faith in yourself and in your abilities, because you will become stronger and you will only become a more beautiful person if you are willing to see it.


Love D

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